3 Types of Toxic Relationships and How to Deal With Them
Toxic relationships can be difficult to identify because they often look normal on the surface. But when you dig deeper, you might discover that your relationship has become unhealthy. A toxic relationship leaves you feeling unsupported, dismissed, undervalued, unloved, and attacked among other things.
A toxic relationship is one where there is an imbalance of power between two people. One person has more control than the other. They might use emotional manipulation, threats, intimidation, or even violence to keep the other person under their thumb.
The Toxic Friend.
A toxic friend will try to control you by manipulating you into doing things you don’t want to do. They will make promises they won’t keep and then blame you when they fail to deliver. They will use guilt as a weapon against you.
These "friends" make you feel like a supporting character in the reality show of their life. This is usually accompanied by a sense of entitlement.
“You would look so good if you just lost 20 lbs.”
Signs Of A Toxic Friend
Disrespects the boundaries you’ve set
They envy you
They're jealous of the people you love and the love you receive
They tease or insult you regularly
They constantly victimize themselves even when they hurt you
Dealing with a toxic person in your life?
The Toxic Boss.
If you work for an abusive boss, you need to take steps to protect yourself. You should document everything that happens at work so that you have proof of what happened. You should also consider leaving your job if you feel unsafe.
These people create their brand of daily hell for their employees. Often motivated by trying to keep their thinly veiled egos protected, these supervisors/managers will throw you under the bus if necessary.
They hold a promotion over your head.
They will continuously insinuate or outright tell you that if you just do a little more, you'll advance. If you do make a mistake, that will be the one reason among the hundreds of things you did right, that you haven't been promoted.
It's personal, not business.
Decisions are based on how they're feeling, not what's best for the company or its staff. I know someone who was treated badly for years because he didn't invite his boss to his birthday party.
They use scare tactics.
I have firsthand experience with this. I worked for a man who was unhappy with the amount of devotion we were demonstrating. So, he called in candidates for each of our positions and had us interview them. He had no intention of hiring anyone else, but he had to prove a point. All he proved that day was how emotionally unstable he was.
The Toxic Spouse.
A toxic spouse uses emotional abuse to control his partner. He might use verbal abuse, isolation, threats, intimidation, and other forms of manipulation to keep her under his thumb. Here's the thing, no matter how hard you love them or work to do everything right, they will never change their abusive behavior. They aren't being abusive because you did something wrong, they're abusing you because they are abusers.
Other people, will address their partners without abusive tactics.
If you're dealing with a narcissist or someone displaying narcissistic traits, they will never get better. These people rarely seek out professional help because, to them, everyone else is the problem. But, on the off chance they do enter therapy, it may be years before there are any improvements–if ever. Do you want to stick around to find out if they'll change?
What can you do to deal with toxic people?
If you’re looking for a healthy relationship, then you need to make sure that you’re not putting yourself into situations where you will be vulnerable to being taken advantage of. This means avoiding people who are emotionally abusive, controlling, or manipulative. It also means making sure that you’re setting good boundaries so you won’t feel pressured by others to do things that you don’t want to do.
You have to be willing to walk away from anyone who doesn't take immediate and consistent action to repair the pain they've caused you. This isn't a TikTok challenge. You don't have to remain in a toxic situation to prove anything to anyone. The best way to deal with toxic people is to stay away from them.
Toxic Relationship Quotes and Affirmations:
Their toxic or abusive behavior is their choice, not a consequence of something you did.
If it's important to you, you're never asking for too much.
If the idea of hurting you doesn't hurt them, they don't care about you.
You can't have boundaries if you don't have expectations.
Never love anyone at the expense of loving yourself.
